Hello friends!
There are a number of characteristics that make a person attractive. From physical appearance to lifestyle choices, to having self-respect and living out your passions, what exactly makes someone attractive, and how can you be as attractive as possible so that you end up having a healthy and fulfilling relationship? Let’s figure it out.
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There are two problems when it comes to relationships, well there’s way more than two, but let’s focus on these for today:
Too many people settle for losers who don’t take care of themselves.
Too many people are losers who don’t take care of themselves.
If you’re settling for losers who just can’t seem to get their shit together, what does that say about you? And if you happen to be on the reverse end of the spectrum, then that means that you’re the loser who can’t seem to get their shit together, and what does that say about you?
If you want to raise your attractiveness level but see yourself as either person in the above scenario, you’re going to have some work to do. And that work is always going to be focused on you, never your partner.
Let’s say your person number one and you’re settling for losers who don’t take care of themselves. What can you do? First things first, if you’re miserable and in a relationship with a loser that you’re taking care of as some sort of quasi-child, you should probably end things. If you’re person number two, lazy, pathetic, and a self-proclaimed loser, recognizing and admitting that to yourself will be the first step. Once those are both out of the way, now the real work begins.
I’m going to provide five things to work on in order to become a more attractive person. Why five? Because I like lists and five seems like a good place to begin.
1. Stop Settling
A lot of us settle for what comes our way in life. We settle for dysfunctional relationships, we tolerate intolerable behavior, and we turn a blind eye to the things that bother us. If we want to be as attractive as possible, no longer settling for the scraps of life is going to be a good first step. This has nothing to do with entitlement, rather, no longer settling means you have high self-respect and high self-worth.
2. Live Out Your Passions
Most people are living mundane, monotonous, and nonpassionate lives. If everything you’re doing sucks the life energy out of you, you’re definitely not living out your passions. When you’re engaged in whatever it is your passionate about, you feel focused, energized, and enthusiastic about your life. This energy will bleed over into your relationships, and you will begin to attract more people.
3. Style
With regards to style, I’m going to be speaking directly to men. Ladies, there’s a shitload of resources that can teach you to dress more attractively, but I am not going to be one of them in this scenario. So let’s start with the basics. Most men are wearing clothes that are too big for them. If you’re wearing an XL, you’re probably going to look better in a Large. If you’re wearing Mediums all the time, you’re more than likely going to look better wearing a Small. Try this out next time you’re shopping for new shirts. With regards to color choices, you can never go wrong with the trinity: Black, Grey, and White (preferably no logos). As far as pants go, finding some jeans that are a bit more tapered and not so baggy will definitely up your style game. I personally wear slim-fit jeans. I recommend having a few pairs ready to go: a light distressed dark wash, a cool grey pair, some light distressed blues, and then a light distressed light wash. If you don’t know what the fuck I’m talking about, my guy online is Aaron Marino from Alpha M. Any style questions at all, he’s got the answers. I’ll link his YouTube Channel here.
4. Workout
Single-handedly, this will be one of the best decisions you’ll ever make in your entire life. The power, strength, and discipline you gain in the gym translates over into every other aspect of your life. Not only will you look and feel better physically, but you will be mentally and psychologically healthier and stronger. In fact, if I had to give just one tip to being more attractive, working out would be my go-to.
5. Confidence
Confidence, confidence, confidence. We all want confidence. I recently wrote an article entitled Competence Equals Confidence. If you haven’t had a chance to read it, I’ll link it here. Confidence doesn’t happen overnight. It isn’t some sort of switch you can flip on and off. In order to develop confidence, you’re going to have to be constantly pushing yourself. It comes through practice, discipline, consistency, and getting out of your comfort zone.
Implement these five things in your life and you will be on the road to attractiveness. Remember, it’s not about appearing attractive or trying to trick people into thinking you’re attractive, it’s about being actually attractive. And at the end of the day, what it’s really about, is living up to your full potential and having the most fulfilling and meaningful life possible.
Until next Monday,
Trevor
(Note: If you enjoy this newsletter, please consider sharing it with someone who would get a lot out of it. If this was shared with you, you can sign up here to receive it each Monday morning. It’s free, plus you get a handful of special "thank you's" when you sign up).